Well last November I was blessed with the book, "Yelling: The Cause, The Casualty, The Cure" by Lorrie Flem. I always felt like I was yelling at my 3 boys. Now granted I was also a hormonal ball of nerves back in November due to being pregnant. But that isn't an excuse. It was an underlying trigger that would get tweaked quite often.
"Yelling: The Cause, The Casualty, The Cure" was very important to me to read. So much so that I actually had purchased it before knowing I would be reviewing it. The days spent yelling at my boys outweighed the days not yelling. I noticed my two younger boys even yelling when they got frustrated/upset at little things. It broke my heart to see the example I was setting be lived out by my children. I knew SOMETHING had to change. That something was ME.
There were 11 tips of advice from Lorrie that helped me identify what needed to be done. I won't give them all away cause you just need to read them for yourself. It was very eye opening and humbling for me to read but also very kind in the way that Lorrie approaches the subject. She wants to help us mom's and does so out of love for us. God gave her a gift of reaching women.
So an update on my "yelling" problem. Have I stopped yelling? No, not completely. Am I following the steps suggested by Lorrie? Yes, as much as I can. I need to do better and I am working on each step. #1 is the most important one and I will give that one to you. Pray to your Heavenly Father. He loves you more than you will ever know. He knows how you feel and wants to help you. Give it to Him. (this is hard for the control freak in me)
I am trying to wake up in the morning before my children so I can exercise and have some Bible time. I need to do though and not try. The scene from Star Wars Episode V comes to mind. "Do or do not. There is no try." ~ Yoda. That said, it is a struggle for me as I am a night owl, have a newborn who nurses before bed and 3 boys who want to wake up at 7am. (though sometimes earlier) But those are excuses. If I REALLY wanted to, I would be in bed earlier so I can wake up when I need to begin my day the right way. This is essential and the days that I have been successful in waking up and spending time with the Lord have gone SO much better.
On top of trying to start my day with the Lord, I have found myself trying to use a quiet voice so the children have to quiet down to listen to me. I also take a breather before I respond to them unless it warrants a quick action (like seeing the 2yo with scissors and running). Something else that you wouldn't think helps is exercising in the morning! It puts me in such a better mood because I did something for myself (and essentially my family). I feel better and thus it impacts my day. Now granted, if the kids push the right buttons, I can spew but I am picking up on what causes the spewing/yelling sprees and trying to think before I speak. These are just a few of the things I am doing.
If you want a book that I believe can truly help you like it has been helping me (as I am still a work in progress), I definitely recommend this book. It has been a true help to me. I believe it can help you too.
So, how do you get this book you might wonder. Well, I bought it as an e-book/pdf from Eternal Encouragement. But it is no longer available there. Now relax. I wouldn't leave you hanging like that! Yelling: The Cause, The Casualty, The Cure is now available on the Kindle! WOOHOO!! If you have a PC, Smartphone (Android or iPhone base), iPad or other tablet you can download the Kindle app. Of course if you have a Kindle you can use that too. ;) The book is $4.99 and is worth every penny! Now, I am a frugal mama and do I have a surprise for you! The book is going to be FREE on Tuesday, July 24th! See, I knew you would like that. Free is always a good thing. Also, if you are on Facebook, stop by the party hosted by Eternal Encouragement on the topic of Yelling and Parenting. These parties are so much fun! You get to meet moms who go through the same things you do and offer idea's to help. This party is also on July 24th. It begins at 2pm. I hope you will join us there.